Ladies, does your period feel ever-so-slightly out of control? Or maybe a whole-lotta out of control? If we had a few hours I could tell you some horrific tales of menstruation disasters. Have I ever shared my opinion of moon cups, for example? (Yes of course I inserted it the right way!) The thing is, almost all of us have endured a menstruation-related crisis of one sort or another. And it really helps when we dare to talk about those disasters and share tips on how to manage them. Here's a few of my "favorite" period problems and the best remedies.

1. You start your period and don't have any supplies, or a way to buy them: You could roll yourself ye olde toilet paper/paper towel/tissue maxi pad. Or you could sacrifice one of your socks. Here's a tutorial on a DIY maxi pad. Don't DIY the tampon, though. DIY tampon could lead to DIY TSS. No bueno.

2. You start your period and don't have any pain reliever, or a way to buy it: This happened to me once when I was visiting a town in Germany where all the pharmacies closed on Sundays. I ended up touring Ludwigsburg castle while breathing through pains that shot from my abdomen through my thighs down to my insteps, but the walking actually helped. A hot water bottle or a hot bath can be soothing. (I know, bath + menstruation = kind of a problem, but you pick your battles.)

3. You do have pain reliever, but your cramps are so atrociously painful that it hardly helps at all and you start wondering how hard it would be to gain access to morphine: This was me in high school. I saw a doctor about this. Turns out I was fine, but it could have been something serious like endometriosis. Personally, I think naproxen works best for menstrual pain.

4. You vomit your pain reliever because your cramps are so intense: This was also me in high school. Again, see your doctor. Until then, avoid taking pain reliever on an empty stomach. Sip some mint tea and rest through the worst if you can.

5. You stand up and let out a gush of blood. Or, you sneeze, cough, or laugh and let out a gush of blood: It happens to everyone. Just change your tampon and/or pad.

6. You bleed through your clothes -- and not just your underwear: Okay, here's some tips on getting out period stains, and here are more tips on removing blood stains. If you can, lock yourself up in a bathroom and try these methods. If it looks like you've gotten all of the blood out successfully, use a hand dryer to dry your clothing. If there's even the slightest bit of pink still there, blot dry with paper towels, and then try to find a sweater or jacket to tie around your waist. And honey, here's a hug. I've been there. I would loan you my sweater right now if I could.

7. You bleed so much you're changing your tampon every hour: Okay, so this is really about menorrhagia, or heavy menstrual bleeding. This could be caused by anything from uterine fibroids to a clotting disorder. Pay attention to your next period, take notes on exactly how insane your bleeding is, and then talk with your doctor about it. Meanwhile, you may want to eat some iron-rich foods or maybe take Slow Fe (the recommended dosage, no more) during your period in case the bleeding makes you anemic.

8. You experience cramps for days but don't start your period: Your cycle could be off and you may actually be ovulating. Or you could be pregnant. Or you could be perimenopausal. Or your body could just be annoying. Take some pain medication and tune in for any other symptoms.

9. You bleed large clumps of something: I get those all the time -- they're just blood clots. At this point I wouldn't be surprised if a space alien came out of my body and spoke my name. Measure any especially large ones (yes really) and mention it to your doctor during your next visit. But it's pretty common and probably nothing to worry about.

10. You spot between periods: Ugh, thank you so much, body. Wear panty liners.

11. You skip your period: You could be pregnant, obvi. Take a home pregnancy test just to rule out that possibility. If you're in your 40s or 50s, you could be perimenopausal. If you're younger, and your pregnancy test comes out negative, and it starts happening a lot, see your doctor.

12. Your period comes early: For a while my period ran 21 days instead of the usual 28. I was told this was within the range of normal. Sucks. Birth control pills may help.

13. You discover you left a tampon inside you ... for more than a day: It happens. Don't panic -- just remove it immediately and watch yourself for any strange-smelling discharge and/or fever, which could be signs of infection.

What's the most disturbing thing that's ever happened to you on your period? How did you handle it?

Image via Arman Zhenikeyev/Corbis

Ladies, we are entering a new age of eyebrow anxiety, and Kim Kardashian is partly to blame. But it's not just her -- it's models like Cara Delevingne who are making women go to extreme lengths for darker, heavier eyebrows. I'm talking eyebrow transplants -- thousands of dollars to implant hairs from the nape of your neck onto your face. According to an article in Harper's Bazaar, eyebrow transplants are all the rage now. But come on, that's crazy, right? They cost between $4,000 to $10,000 and take hours. Is that really the best option for transforming your eyebrows?

We talked with New York City eyebrow stylist/guru Joey Healy to get the scoop on this cosmetic surgery trend and to find out how we ordinary mortals can get bolder brows without blowing 10 grand.

The good news? You can dramatically transform your eyebrows! And we're not missing out on anything with the transplants. Healy says the hairs on the nape of your neck are very different from the ones in your brow -- they grow much faster, for starters. And they have a different texture. He says the hair transplant would probably be helpful in extreme cases, like for burn victims who can't grow hair there at all. But if you just want a fuller brow? "There are more practical solutions."

Even women like me, who have blah, sparse, shapeless brows, can get Natalie Portman's seriously bold look (I can't even remember what happens in the Thor movies because I spent the whole time plotting how to get those eyebrows). The key is to use a combination of methods. But there's one thing everyone who wants to change their brows should start with: "Hands off," Healy says.

1. Your first step is to let your eyebrows grow in for four to six weeks. No plucking, not even the strays. You want to let everything grow in so you can see what the possibilities are and what you have to work with. You may be surprised to see more hair than you thought you had.

2. Meanwhile, for instant gratification, Healy recommends applying a brow powder with a stiff brush to fill in your gaps. He says it will look better than a pencil; plus, there are great options now that are forgiving (you can wipe them off if you make a mistake) and are waterproof.

3. You can also try a brow serum, clear gel you apply day and night. "Peptides in the serum generate hair growth," Healy says. At $125 his Brow Renovation Serum is pricey, but it's still a whole lot cheaper than a transplant.

More from The Stir: Kim Kardashian's Eyebrows Inspire Cutting-Edge Beauty Procedure

4. Once you've grown out your brows, you can start shaping -- carefully. If you can see a specialist at a salon, that's great, though Healy doesn't recommend waxing or threading because they make growing back hair harder and because tweezing gives you more control over details.

5. Another option is eyebrow hair dyeing, which Healy recommends getting done at a salon instead of at home. A professional will get everything, even the little baby hairs, and can dye more safely. We're talking about your face, after all. So if you have thin, pale eyebrows, you might want to try dyeing and then some powder to fill in the spaces between, for example. It's the combination of the two that will truly transform your eyebrows in a way that looks authentic, even in daylight.

"For some women," Healy says, transforming your eyebrows "is more of a journey." It takes some time, some patience, some experimenting. So great, maybe Natalie Portman's eyebrows are a reality for me after all. I just have to take it slow.

Whose eyebrows do you envy?

Image via Leland Bobbe/Corbis

You're engaged -- congratulations! And you can't wait to share your exciting news with everyone. But how? With a hilariously brilliant video, or a beautifully engraved announcement, or writing it in the sky with an airplane? There are so many creative possibilities! Or you could just post a photo of your engagement ring on Facebook -- because that's what everyone's dying to see. 

But before you make the big announcement, there's one thing you need to do. We talked with two wedding experts about the best way to announce your engagement, and they both gave the same advice for their number-one tip. This, ladies, is the most important thing you need to do when you announce your engagement.

Tell your inner circle first, over the phone.

"I feel it's important to call or visit the major players in your life and share that really exciting, happy news with them first," says Allison Moir-Smith of Emotionally Engaged bridal counseling. This means your parents, grandparents, siblings, other close relatives, and your closest friends. "Whoever is in your closest-knit group, you really want to avoid letting them hear about it in a mass way."

And no, email isn't personal enough. This is about sharing an emotional connection and letting people know how important they are to you. "You can't quite convey that excitement or share it quite the same way" unless you're in person or talking on the phone.

Then later, when you tell everyone, "think about the words you use," Moir-Smith says. "You only get to do this once." So rather than just blurting out "OMG we're getting married!" on Facebook, maybe write something like "We're so excited to share something special with you all ... "

Lizzie Post, co-author of the new 6th edition of Emily Post's Wedding Etiquette, agrees that letting in friends and family first on your upcoming nuptural before posting the big relationship status is the most important piece of etiquette. "What you don't want is for Grandma to log onto Facebook and find out you're getting married and haven't told her about it first."

When you share the moment with your closest family and friends, you might want to let them know whether or not to spread the word. Do you want them to keep it secret until you make your mass announcement? Or would you like them to go ahead and start telling cousins, aunts and uncles? Make your expectations clear.

There doesn't seem to be a clear rule about who you call first -- because that really depends on who you and your fiance are closest to. Once you've included your nearest and dearest in this important life event, then your announcement is limited only by your imagination. Your friends and family will enjoy your announcement all the more for having felt like they were participants.

How do you feel about announcing your engagement via social media?

Image via Zero Creatives/cultura/Corbis

It doesn't take a major scientific study -- or the Daily Mail -- to tell us first impressions matter on a first date. But guess what: You're about to get this newsflash anyway. According to a big survey of 2000 people by AXA, you have exactly12 minutes to make an impression on a first date. Your moment of judgment is swift and fleeting, so you'd better get it right. Or else! You'll just have to go on another first date with someone else.

If you want Cupid's arrows on your side, be sure to smile a lot, make eye contact, breathe out minty freshness, use a pleasant tone of voice, and wear a spiffy outfit. These all sound straight from the No Shit Files, but you'd be amazed how often people get them wrong. If, on the other hand, you are determined to torpedo your chance at love with Mr. New, be sure to have foul body odor, bad breath, swear a lot, dress like a hobo, and scowl. Or try any of these proven romance-killing gestures.

1. Forget to wear deodorant and run all the way to your meeting place.

2. Order the Onion Blossom before your date arrives.

3. Try out your best Kristen Stewart impersonation.

4. Wear dark sunglasses because you look much cooler that way.

5. Instead of brushing your teeth, try oil pulling, but only for about 30 seconds because it's not like you have all day to swish coconut oil around your mouth, sheesh.

6. Wear something vintage, like that old sweatshirt your roommate threw out the other day.

7. Pretend you're Malcolm Tucker from In the Loop. Bonus points for a convincing Scottish accent.

8. Make eye contact with your date vicariously via your smartphone.

9. Give your dog a big, wet, sloppy, open-mouth kiss before you leave.

10. Denim overalls are a thing this summer, right?

11. Impress your date with your ability to say f*** in 50 different languages.

12. Hope your date feels the same way about wearing Snuggies in public as you do.

13. Stare at your date's mouth because it'll make them worry there's something there. Now you have upper hand, you date wizard you!

14. Smiling is for tools.

15. Coat yourself with Icy Hot preemptively in case the sex is super strenuous -- you don't want to be sore the next day.

16. Volunteer at your zoo's monkey house just before your date.

17. Pretend you're Captain America: Wear your childhood Underoos, run around, and try to lift big, heavy objects. Superheroes are hot.

18. Curse loudly when you can't lift those objects.

19. Wear your irresistibly cute giant moose costume.

20. Don't bother wearing clothes because your date really should just get to know the real you from the start.

What's the biggest turn-off for you on a first date?

Image via Daniel Koebe/Corbis

You've found your soul mate, you've been together for a while, and you feel like you're ready to take it to the next level. Maybe even marriage -- eek! Is he the prefect life-long partner for you? Wouldn't we all love a crystal ball to show us exactly what to expect from a man in the future. I've known women who fretted over doubts all the way up to the altar who went on to enjoy long, fulfilling marriages. And I've known women who were 100 percent sure of their man only to find out they'd ignored some pretty important red flags along the way.

The thing is, sometimes a red flag looks a little, well, gray. And chances are there might be something about your man that makes you wonder a little. But you kind of want to just give him a pass because you don't want to be hypercritical -- and because you really love him, dammit! Sometimes those little things can turn into a big deal later on. Here are 3 red flags you're better off facing right now, before you let things go any further.

1. He's not that into sex. Okay, some of you may consider that a plus. He never pesters you to have sex. If you're not in the mood it's never an issue, and you never feel pressured. Except ... come on, a guy who never initiates sex? Who never brings it up? Who never tries to seduce you? You need to look into that, because it's definitely atypical.

There are many reasons why a man may not seem interested in sex. He could be gay, he could be depressed, he may be getting some on the side. Whatever the problem is, you'd better uncover it before making a commitment to this guy because it's almost always an indication of a bigger issue that's just going to blow up in a much worse way later on.

More from The Stir: 12 Reasons Your Man Doesn't Want to Have Sex Anymore

2. He's moody and deals with disappointment and stress by sulking, or drinking, or eating a lot. This touches on two things crucial to a long-term relationship: Emotional resilience and healthy coping mechanisms. If he lets the little things get to him every time, that's a problem. How your boyfriend "does life" matters a lot.

We all have our ups and downs -- we're human. It's how we respond that matters. There are healthy ways to deal with stress (talking, exercise, meditation, breathing exercises) and there are unhealthy ways (stomping and slamming doors like a toddler, withdrawing for hours, getting high). You want to make sure he can see past the frustrations of the moment, that he has faith in his ability to solve problems, and that he can get back up and keep going when he's knocked down.

3. He's a lone wolf with few friends who feels largely misunderstood by the world. This has a romantic allure -- only you truly understand your man! You're both that special. But there's a dark side to this personality type that could undermine your relationship down the road. Everyone should have at least a couple long-term friends. That's a sign of loyalty and empathy.

Even artists with eccentric vision find people to connect with. You want to see your man connecting with others in a positive way because it shows he can work as a team -- and marriage is a lot about teamwork. Plus, you cannot be anyone's sole life line. It's unhealthy to be anyone's "everything." Hello, codependent relationship!

Just because you're finally facing a relationship deal breaker doesn't necessarily mean it's over between you forever. Maybe it means your guy needs to get help so he can get to a place where he can truly commit to you. Helping him face his issues is the most altruistic, selfless way to love him, whatever happens.

Are there issues in your relationship you've ever regretted ignoring?

Image via Ocean/Corbis

Start a story with "so I was wearing this pink satin bustier" and you pretty much know how it's going to end: With an "oopsie!" So it's no surprise that while filming a video for her single "On My Way" in a pink satin bustier, Lea Michele suffered a nip slip. (Ahem, look what else was on its way.) The triple-threat from Glee pranced about saucily, giving everyone on the set a free show for quite some time apparently before she was informed of her bustier's wayward ways and pulled her girls back in. Well, it was just one side, really. Does that make it any better? I guess you'd have to see how bad it was to decide.

WARNING: Explicit photo below.

Could no one have stopped the Hair musical reenactment to inform Lea of her fugitive nipple? Or was the atmosphere just so free and easy, no one thought it mattered? Note to everyone I know: If I ever do this, please tell me immediately, even if you have to stop traffic to do so. Do not delay! Act now.

I can't imagine that Lea couldn't feel herself popping out, anyway, unless the bustier was so loose on her, she was feeling a breeze. Couldn't you feel that? Hello, that part of your body is kind of more sensitive than the rest.

More from The Stir: Lea Michele's Teeny-Tiny Bikini Isn't the Only Hot Thing About Her Look

Lea laughed it off like a pro -- which is exactly how anyone should handle a wardrobe malfunction. It's just her boob. No animals or children were injured in the making of this nip slip, just Lea's dignity. And she's got enough self-confidence to survive that. Not to mention, this isn't the first oopsie moment for Lea. Remember her "surprising" underboob flash? Maybe she likes flirting with disaster.

Lea was also frolicking about in a barely there bathing suit and some sort of other skimpy fringed thing for the video shoot, so maybe she was feeling especially generous about sharing her physical gifts with the world. Can you blame her? I don't see anyone complaining.

Would you feel it if you suffered a nip slip in the great outdoors?

Images via msleamichele/Instagram, Oceanup.com

Happy Grilled Cheese Month! Time to celebrate that toasty, buttery, ooey-gooey goodness that comes from melted cheese between crisp bread. One of the things I love most about grilled cheese sandwiches is that there are a bazillion different possible combinations. You could have a different one every day for a year and never repeat an idea! Some of you are traditionalists who love to stick with the original: American cheese between white slices. But for those of you who believe variety is the spice of life, I give you 8 fun, meltingly delicious grilled cheese sandwiches to try before the end of April. Are you ready? Go!

Needless to say, NONE of Selena Gomez's friends are thrilled that she's back together with Justin Bieber -- whatever "together" actually means. But now that rumored plans for a major intervention have been leaked, it looks like a friend backlash is in full force. Selena just unfollowed former BFF Taylor Swift and has deleted all traces of her on Instagram. And she didn't stop with Taylor -- she did the same with Kylie and Kendall Jenner -- and she stopped following anyone at all. So it's like that. Gomez is cutting out all Bieber non-believers from her online life. It's like they were never friends at all ...

This is the 21st century version of cutting up photos of our ex-friends. And I think Selena will regret it someday. Right now she may feel betrayed. She may be hurting from their lack of support (well, actually, the supportive thing is to disapprove of her whatsit with Bieber, but you know what I mean). Maybe she feels like these relationships have been damaged beyond repair. Maybe she's right about that.

Of course, we don't really know if Bieber is the reason Selena cut out the Jenner girls. Just a few days ago, they were enjoying a love fest together at Coachella. What happened? Did they start in on Selena's sort-of boyfriend, too, or was it something completely different?

At any rate, even if these BFF bonds have loosened, Selena's destroying happy memories, too. She's cutting out parts of her own personal history. When you're that negative, you end up hurting yourself most of all.

I hope she finds a way to reconnect with Taylor, Kylie, and Kendall again. I hate to think that her fixation on Bieber is making her cut out some of the best parts of her life -- her pals and the experiences she's shared with them. That would just be sad.

What do you think it would take for Selena to repair these friendships?

Image via selenagomez/Instagram

Say "hot dogs for dinner tonight" and most of us think of the kind of last-minute kid-friendly meal we whip up on autopilot without having to think much about it. But I've been investigating all the possibilities of this overlooked dish, and I've realized I've overlooked some pretty dang creative options. Whether you're cooking for children or for yourself, there are so many fun things you can do with the humble frankfurter -- and they're all delicious, too. Here are just 12 of our favorite crazy riffs on the hot dog.

By the way, there is a recall of Oscar Mayer hot dogs because the packages may contain Classic Cheese Dogs -- a problem for those of you avoiding dairy. So just be careful and get the 411 on the recall before buying hot dogs.

More from The Stir: Mummy Hot Dogs Recipe Is Scary Good

When macaroni and cheese is good, it's like you died and went to melted carb heaven. But when it's bad? Oh the sadness. We hate that feeling of disappointment when you've anticipated this creamy, gooey comfort food and it turns out wack. Maybe the sauce is too dry, or it melts weird, or the macaroni is so mushy, there's nothing to chew. Have these happened to you? Let's troubleshoot some of the most common mac and cheese mistakes then. Together, we will give this ultimate love-in-a-bowl every bit of cheesy goodness it deserves.

1. Cheese sauce gets grainy when it cools. This almost always happens when I use cheddar or when I get fancy and use a hard cheese like Gruyere. For a smoother sauce, try using a softer cheese like Havarti, Jack, or Fontina, which all melt like a dream. Mozzarella isn't bad if you mix it with other cheese and you don't use fresh mozzarella, but it has a tendency to go stringy sometimes.

More from The Stir: 6 Fun Mac and Cheese Recipes Your Whole Family Will 'Eat Up' (PHOTOS)

2. Cheese sauce separates while you're cooking it. This is all about the white sauce you start with. Make sure you cook your butter and flour mixture (1 tablespoon flour to 1 tablespoon butter) until it gives off a nutty smell. Then SLOWLY add the milk (1 cup), whisking as you go. Only after your white sauce is completely combined and starts to thicken do you add finely grated cheese -- and again, add that very slowly, and this time stir with a spoon, not a whisk.

Also: Add your pasta the minute your sauce is at a state of perfection. You'll want to have it cooked, drained, and ready to go when you start your sauce. Take everything off the heat and just combine; no further cooking needed. And speaking of pasta ...

3. Pasta is too mushy. This happens when you cook your pasta too long before adding the sauce, or when you let it cook in the sauce. Remember that even after you take everything off the burner, that sauce is still going to be hot. So under-cook your elbows just a tad before adding them to that sauce.

Unless you like your macaroni melted -- in which case, knock yourself out!

4. Your boxed mac and cheese sauce is all kinds of wrong. This is for those of you with a severe case of kitchen cluelessness, and no, I'm not judging you. (We've all made these mistakes.) These are the keys to success with powdered cheese. First, don't just dump the cheese powder and milk directly over your cooked noodles. Drain them first, set them aside, and mix together the cheese and milk using the measurements given in the directions on the box. (Adding butter makes it even better.) Use a whisk. Once you've got that sauce, turn off the heat and then add your elbows.

Macaroni and cheese excellence is within everyone's grasp, America. You can do this. Enjoy!

Do you have any secrets or tips to add to this list?

Image via Nicole Hill/Rubberball/Corbis

How confused are we when it comes to our relationships? Well, according to this infographic on Americans' Weird Habits, we're more in love with our phones than each other, we're sleeping with cats and dogs, and we don't know when we're on a date. Oh wait -- I forgot the part about how we all have assigned seating in our homes. Are we really this messed up about our love lives?

1. Given the choice between life without a cellphone or life without sex, 26 percent of us would keep the phone, and 20 percent of us would keep the sex. Well ... that's not a huge difference. I'm a little sad for the people who would choose their phones, but mostly I'm grateful we don't actually have to choose between the two.

2. But what's this about 44 percent of us sleeping with our phones? Like actually in the bed with us? Or maybe just under the pillow where we left them after finishing that one last play in Words With Friends? Not that I would know anything about that.

3. And 58 percent of us sleep with a dog or a cat? Where does that leave significant others? Oh, right ...

4. More and more of us are living alone these days, more than one in four of us.

5. And no wonder, because apparently we don't even know how to date. Supposedly 69 percent of singles are unsure whether an outing with someone they like is actually, like, a date date or just hanging out.

6. As for having assigned seats in our living rooms, well, that's probably good for our relationships because it keeps disputes down. Right? Unless that's totally bizarre, too. Actually, now that I think about it ...

If you take all of these little factoids, if you believe them, and create a composite person, you have a loner-type who doesn't know how to have a relationship. Someone who probably isn't too keen on eye contact because they're constantly staring at their phone. And someone who's a bit inflexible about sharing space with others.

But obviously we're not all this weird. People go on real dates all the time, and we're fully aware that it's a date. We learn how to compromise, even about our favorite chair. And if you think about it, dogs fit at the foot of the bed just fine, and "sleeping" with your phone usually means keeping it next to you on the bedside table.

So maybe all of these little factoids are true on some level -- but I don't think they show us the whole picture of how relationship-ready we all are. We're not quite as hopeless as all that.

Do these "weird habits" ring true to you, or do they just seem weird out of context?

Image via David Adelman and Alex Hillsberg

Do you ever wake up and immediately share your dreams with your significant other? If not, you may want to start making that a regular part of your morning routine. It turns out that men and women have very different nightmares. A study of nearly 10,000 dreams reported by 500 subjects reveal that women have nightmares about interpersonal conflict (fights and disagreements). Men most often have nightmares about natural disasters. Even more interesting, women usually have someone dealing with that conflict with them in their dreams. Men, on the other hand, are usually dealing with those fires and volcanoes alone.

Of course, these are generalizations. Your nightmares, or your husband's, may be totally different. Still, these two kinds of nightmares say a lot about how differently men and women deal with stress -- and we can use that. Talking about those dreams could get you talking as a couple about difficult issues you'd otherwise have a hard time discussing.

Why women have nightmares about relationship conflicts is kind of a no-brainer: It's what we're most concerned about while awake. But what about men and natural disasters? Are guys really harboring fears of earthquakes? I asked dream expert and author Lauri Loewenberg to shed some light on what's really going on in men's minds when the lights go out. 

Loewenberg describes dreams in general as a "brutally honest representation" of what's going on in your life, and how you feel about it. And nightmares in particular represent a difficult situation you're facing in your waking life -- often one you're not dealing with effectively.

It's not surprising that women's scary dreams involve companions. We love to talk about our problems and get input and advice from others. We don't like to deal with our issues alone. But men tend to internalize a lot more and avoid asking for advice, "just like they avoid asking for directions," Loewenberg says.

In her years of experience Loewenberg has observed the same thing this new study found: Men's nightmares tend to be more action-packed and violent. She says they reflect the dreamer's emotional state. For example, a dream about fire or a volcano could represent feelings of anger a guy might be burying while awake. That nighttime rehashing is "a healthy expression of what they're feeling" -- and can give guys another chance to deal with that stress.

So what does this mean for couples? "Sharing your dreams is a great way to start your day," Loewenberg says, whether or not you had a nightmare. It gives you a chance to get an emotional read on each other. Talking about dreams helps you understand each other, especially scary emotions buried deep inside us. Once you get that insight into each other, you can do a better job of supporting each other.

How often do you talk about your dreams with your S.O.? Have you ever gotten any special insight from sharing?

When it comes to relationship mistakes, there's one biggie almost guaranteed to end it all. The mother of all dealbreakers. The worst thing possible: Cheating. As some of us know, it's extremely difficult to repair the damage of infidelity. What do you do if you've made that horrible, regrettable mistake because of your own personal foolishness, not because you wanted out of your marriage? What if you actually want to save your marriage, despite this painful betrayal?

A new study on infidelity gives hope to couples grappling with the consequences of an affair. You actually might be able to save your marriage -- if you handle it the right way. The key? Don't keep the affair a secret.

The study followed 134 couples over five years, and wouldn't you know it, there were incidents of infidelity in 19 of those couples. Here's the surprising thing. Of the marriages in which the cheater tried to hide their adultery, 80 percent divorced. But when the cheater confessed, only 43 percent divorced. Fewer than half.

Obviously, revealing your big secret isn't guaranteed to save your marriage. And this is a very small sample. But I think there's still a lot we can learn from this study. I talked with family counselor Dr. Laurie Moore for her insights into what this study means for couples.

Dr. Moore says the reason why coming clean makes such a dramatic difference is because of what it communicates to your spouse. If you confess because you want to repair the relationship and your intention is to not continue the affair, "it shows you care; you have remorse and respect them enough to tell them," she says. 

But when you try to bury that regrettable fling under the carpet and hope it just goes away? First of all, good luck with that, because people almost always find out. And when that happens, your spouse gets a very different message. "That they are not important to you," Dr. Moore says. Your spouse feels "more betrayed, more lied to, and there's more damage."

Okay, so you know what you have to do. How do you do it?

Start with your intention: This is only going to work if you really, truly plan to never make that mistake ever, ever again. Dr. Moore recommends finding a time when you can talk and focus on each other. Start by saying, "I need to talk to you about something. I made a choice I regret, but because I respect and love you, I want to take time to talk about it." In your own words, of course.

After you explain what you did, you need to tell your spouse how that made you feel -- that you regret it. AND they need to hear you say you're determined not to cheat again, because your spouse is much more important to you than an affair.

That's a tough conversation to have, but you're not done yet. "Your mate is going to feel embarrassed, hurt, devastated" after hearing this news, Dr. Moore says. The more deeply in love with you, the deeper the hurt. (On the other hand, if your spouse seems to get over it quickly, that may show they weren't that invested in the relationship in the first place.)

"You have to be willing to accept the feelings your mate has," Dr. Moore says. "Be compassionate and have patience. It will take a while for your mate to get over it." But hang in there -- the most important thing is that you make your spouse feel loved and cherished, and that you've made it clear you never want to hurt them that way again.

Do you know any couples who recovered from infidelity? How did they make it work? Is this something you could ever forgive?

Image via Tomas Rodriguez/Corbis

I know we've never seen Kristen Bell like THIS before. Four actresses dared to bare it all for Allure's annual nude celebs shoot (May issue): Kristen Bell, Jenna Dewan Tatum, Nia Long, and Minnie Driver. They all look amazing -- of course! But what's more shocking is what they have to say about posing nude. Keep in mind, all four of these women are moms; Kristen and Jenna had their babies just months ago. Two of them are over 40. Some of these famously beautiful women harbor a few insecurities about their bodies -- just like we do. But that's not all they have to share.

Kristen Bell says being outspoken about body acceptance made doing the daring shoot a no-brainer. "I talk a big game about being comfortable no matter my size. I wanted to put my money where my mouth was." But she's still bashful about showing one part of her body: "My belly skin has made me self-conscious, and it's only gotten worse since I've had a baby," she says.

Her butt is another story altogether, though. "I'm a fan of my own buns. I'm very happy with the amount that I've been given, and I often attempt to sculpt them into something more than what I've been given. But I notice other people's buns quite a bit." Probably her husband Dax Shepard's especially.

Kristen confesses she was worried at first about how pregnancy would change her figure. "I was terribly frightened that I would feel like a schlub and not at all beautiful. But I've never been so comfortable with my body. When I looked in the mirror, I saw Cindy Crawford."

Jenna Dewan Tatum is a dancer, so her relationship with nudity is relaxed. "You sort of lose all modesty as a dancer. I also think it's just the way I came out. I've always been free-spirited, and it was hard to keep clothes on me as a kid." The new mom admits she spends "a lot" of time naked -- in private, I'm sure.

Minnie Driver poses nude at the age of 44: Respect. But here's the surprising thing -- she says being older actually made it easier. "I never could have done this when I was 25. No way. All I saw were the flaws. I still see flaws, but I see what's great more -- and I've got a banging body." Um, that's kind of awesome. She admits she was still a little bit nervous about the shoot, "but I actually really love my body -- it's done amazing things for me. There's such a grace to being confident in who you are."

Except for one thing: "My boobs do make me a little bit self-conscious," Minnie admits, "because I had a baby and things really do change. I would rather go bottomless on the beach than topless actually, as it turns out -- you'll never see that, of course." 

Nia Long, who is the mother of two, says the same thing: "When you have kids, your body changes drastically, and we have to learn to appreciate ourselves as we are. My boobs are not the same as they were before; I'm not going to lie." But she's proud to take it all off -- at the age of 43. And if any one of us looked that great at 43, so would we ... right?

Have you felt more comfortable with your body the older you've gotten?

Image via Imeh Akpanudosen/Getty

When you start all over after a divorce you get a lot of misinformation about what's out there -- and what you deserve. After I split with my husband of 16 years I was almost certain I'd just spend the rest of my life single. I was ready for that. And it's because of everything I was hearing about dating and relationships after divorce. I have to say, the landscape looked treacherous from where I stood. But maybe I was listening to the wrong voices? It turns out, when it comes to finding love again after divorce, it's not as complicated or difficult as you'd think. Forget the unhelpful noise you hear -- like these 5 bits of popular wisdom.

1. You're damaged goods. Something about surviving a bad relationship makes people feel less lovable, for some reason. The stigma of divorce is fading (finally, thank goodness!) but it's still hard to shake that feeling that you deserve less. But that's bunk. You are a survivor, and you deserve good love. Period.

Instead, consider your experience and what you have to offer your "social price," as Dr. David Anderson puts it. "The more you have to offer in a relationship, the more you can expect in return, thus increasing your appropriate social price."

2. It's slim pickings out there. That's what I hear all the time, especially from my single friends. And to a certain extent, they're right. Dysfunctional man-baby knuckleheads abound. But there are also men who are kind and mature; They've had the same kinds of ups and downs in love that all of us have, and that's why they're still single.

3. Time is running out. Just after I split with my husband I felt this pressure, like I had just a couple years left of being attractive before I hit my old hag years. That's bananas. I mean, I should have more faith in my ability to age well. But that aside, this isn't a race. The men my age are getting older, too. We're aging together. And you need to let thing unfold in their own time or risk making a hasty mistake: The rebound relationship.

4. You're going to ruin your new relationship with your old baggage. You're not -- if you've done the work and are paying attention. Be present in the moment so you can be aware of old patterns of thinking or feeling creeping in. Remember you're dealing with a new person, not your ex. Also, everyone has baggage, not just divorced people.

5. A new relationship will make you whole again. It won't. You need to find out how to be a whole person on your own, first, before you find a new person to love. You can't use a new relationship to heal from the last one.

What's the most surprising thing you learned about finding love after divorce?

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Have you seen this shoe? I'm talking about Stuart Weitzman's "Nudist" sandal, seen on every celeb's well-manicured foot these days. They have a simple elegance (er, because they're barely there) and they'll go with almost everything in your closet. I love them! If only they did not cost $398 I would have one in every color. Or even just one pair.

But guess what -- the Nudist is already being knocked off by everyone. And this is great news for us non-celebs who spend all our shoe money on sneakers for the kids. Here are 8 version of the It-sandal of the season you can actually afford.

Allergy season is upon us, my friends. Are you ready? It's time to gather your allergy survival kit. We asked our fellow sufferers what must-have remedies they keep on hand every year -- besides the obvious boxes and boxes of the softest tissues you can find. Oh, and the big guns: Steroid nasal spray and allergy shots. Yikes! We're talking about soothers you can get without a prescription and keep in a basket on your desk, in your bedside table drawer, and in your glove compartment.

Ever leave someone and then fantasize about how miserable and heartbroken they are without you? No one is proud of having those thoughts. It's no badge of honor to wish someone unhappiness, but there's a special kind of anger that comes from a breakup that sends you there anyway. So when I first saw thispersonal ad from a 1973 newspaperposted on Reddit, I was riveted. Here it was: Like a message in a bottle, a man named Rick bares the raw pain he feels at his girlfriend's departure. "SUE," it begins. "Since you last left me, my heart has felt a great loss." GO ON ...

"The house has felt darker than ever before. No one to talk to me at mealtimes. The warm glow that greeted me upon coming home is no longer there." Yes! Finally, Rick realizes all the ways Sue enriched his life with her love. He misses her companionship, her affection, her conversational skills. I'm almost starting to feel a little sorry for Rick.

"Never had I realized how lonely life could be." You just never appreciate what you have until it's gone. Maybe, before Sue, Rick was perfectly content to be alone. And then she came into his life -- and then she left. And now, on the other side, being single feels completely different. He misses her so much, poor guy.He learned his lesson. He gets it.

"Knowing how much this loss has hurt me, please stop my suffering and --" Oh my God, this is the part where he begs her to come back! He's actually groveling, playing on her compassion. What did Sue do when she read this? I wonder if she took Rick back! Oh wait -- holy shit, you have to read the rest of his sentence.

"... and send the TV back."

Rick, you little stinker. No wonder Sue left you and took your TV with her. What a setup. I can't believe I fell for this!

Sue, wherever you are, did you fall for this too? Did your heart beat faster when you read the beginning of Rick's ad, thinking he'd finally realized what a gem he'd lost in you? Did you harbor a smug sense of satisfaction? Tell me you weren't actually contemplating taking him back just before you read that last line! Did you throw the paper across the kitchen when you got to the end, stomp on it, maybe set it on fire? I wouldn't blame you if you did. He got you, one last time.

What kind of relationship do you think Rick and Sue had before they broke up?

Images via 237/Martin Barraud/Ocean/Corbis, Reddit

You know how we were all obsessed with using argan oil in our hair and on our skin a couple years ago? And then coconut oil took over? Well, there's a new "it" oil in town, ladies: Carrot oil. It sounds like a joke, but I'm dead serious. Carrot oil is happening right now. Here's why.

Carrot oil (made from the seed) is loaded with antioxidant vitamin A, so the idea is that it'll protect your hair from the harsh elements of summer (sun, wind, seawater) while giving it incredible softness and shine. It's sold in a blend that includes other good stuff like safflower oil, aloe, vitamin E, rose hips oil, and pecan seed oil. And here is the best part: You can get it for a mere three bucks! That did it -- I had to try it.

How was I to know disaster was on the horizon?

About that $2.99 price tag -- this is for a teeny 2-ounce bottle. So it's a cheap thrill, but not that cheap. That's okay, though. A little bit goes a long way. Did I say little? I mean infinitesimal, as I found out the hard way.

More From The Stir: 7 Beauty Products You Can Easily Replace With Coconut Oil

According to the directions on the bottle, you can use this new miracle product for a hot oil treatment in just 5 minutes. "Perfect!" I thought. "That will fit right into my super-busy, already impossible, Single Mom Morning Routine." (Cue ominous music.) I heated the oil in hot water while I shampooed, then I poured the warm oil all over my hair. And then, because I have the driest, most desert-like, heat-damaged hair, I worked in some more oil. And some more. Then I shampooed, jumped out, and tried to blow dry my hair.

That quick, post-treatment shampoo hadn't even come close to washing out all that oil. After desperately drying and drying, I still looked like the Creature From the Black Lagoon, my hair was so greasy. "Oh my God," I thought. "What now? I don't have time to re-wash and dry my hair again."

And I was faced with that horrible realization I'm always trying to avoid: I don't know what the hell I'm doing. Ever. And here is proof.

No one should have to face this kind of terrifying existential crisis at 8 in the morning when their kid is waiting to be walked to the bus stop, and I blame the carrot oil (because that's a lot easier than accepting personal responsibility for the chaos that is my life). I did what I had to do. I put my hair back in a ponytail and carried on with my day.

Next morning I shampooed my hair again, twice this time. That did it! I was amazed when I blow dried my hair at how shiny it looked (except I wasn't because I did just do a 24-hour-long deep conditioning treatment). After all that, my hair was a tad dry. So I very carefully worked a drop of oil into my ends. And now I've got beautifully soft, shiny hair. Love it!

Having learned my lessons the hard way, here are some best practices for carrot oil:

I'll have to wait and see how this stuff works at the beach and the pool, but I'm optimistic. If nothing else, it's a fun change for my hair and I love the rose scent. I'd say it's worth a try if you have dry, damaged hair.

Have you ever made the mistake of trying out a new beauty treatment at the worst time?

Image via moodboard/Corbis

Of all the abuses of social media, this is among the worst. In honor of HASHTAG TransformationTuesday, one young man dumped his girlfriend via Instagram -- or that's what it looks like he did, anyway. The post features a photo of a teen couple on the left and another photo of just the boy on the right. And saddest of all, a forlorn comment below: "Is this your way of breaking up with me?"

Is it, cjkarl11, is it?!?

Of all the! That guy! Why! I can't believe! Hopefully this is just a hoax. For all we know, these two may not even be a real couple -- I hope not! But what if it's real? Let's talk about that and some of the other horrible, no good, very bad ways people have ditched their lovers.