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When the very fit and svelte Olivia Wilde gave birth to her son Otis 11 months ago I assumed she probably bounced back to her pre-baby state fairly quickly. Because that's what celeb moms do all the time, right? Haha, of course not. Wait until you hear Wilde's description of her post-baby body.
In this month's issue of Shape, Wilde says her body looked like "a deflated pool toy." In fact, she says, "After giving birth, I joined the ranks of millions of new mothers when I moaned, ‘Why do I still look pregnant? Is there another one stuck in there?’” Aww! Stars, they're just like ... oh never mind.
But back to that metaphor, could it be more perfect? Leave it to Wilde, with her wicked sense of humor, to put it that way. Ouch! So true, and so funny. The only better description of a post-natal belly I've ever read is novelist Ann Lamott's from her memoir, Operating Instructions. She described her stretched-out midsection as a tired dog sleeping by her side.
We laugh because it's such a painful shock!
I remember seeing my stretched-out, wrinkly belly with horror and wondering if/when it would stop looking that way. You either laugh or you cry. I say, choose laughing if you can. Either way, it's not going to change the way your belly looks, so you might as well have a guffaw at your own expense, like Wilde does.
Oh well! It's just the crazy human body. Look what you just did -- you made a human being and pushed it out. Who wouldn't look like a deflated pool toy after that? Or come up with your own clever metaphor.
How would you describe your post-natal belly ... assuming you also have a wicked sense of humor?
Image via Shape magazine
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