OMG, did you hear? Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez hit the sports bars, got totally drunk, and had a knock-out, drag-out fight! Did they break up? Is it over? Who let them underage-drink? See the pictures! Scandalosa!
But then when I look at the pictures, I do not get the voyeuristic thrill I was looking for. Sad face! Selena and Justin walk into a building. Selena and Justin walk out of a building. Selena covers her eyes. A lot. A young man walks around without a shirt. A girl talks to him and he puts on a tank top. Am I missing something here? Take a look.
Okay, in case you missed that link, here's the story again, pictures in thumbnails at the bottom. The post reads, "Justin and Selena were definitely fighting." What? Where? There's no shot of Selena reading Biebs the Riot Act. I mean, okay, this shot of Selena does kind of make her look tipsy. And Justin definitely has a boozy grin. But where's the fight I was promised?
And who the hell is this goofball with the no shirt and the chewing with his mouth wide open? Oh yeah, Justin's BFF Ryan Good.
You know what? I'm going to piece together a different story based on the photographic evidence. So Selena and the Biebs go out partying. They have a few drinks, you know, whatever. Kids these days. And they're joined by their double-date pals Ryan Good and Ashley Benson. And they're like, "OMG, will you put your shirt on? And close your mouth? You're totally embarrassing us!" And Ryan's all, "Shut up, you're just jealous of my waxed chest and these fries!" And finally Ashley's like, "It's over between us!" So he puts his shirt back on. Worst double date, ever!
Did you see a fight in those pictures?
Image via JustinBieberMusic.com