I can't even with this woman anymore, you guys. As much as it pains me to type these words, Rachel Dolezal is in the news yet again. Today's fresh WTF is the revelation that Dolezal has a sex tape out there. Of course she does! But it's not what you think.
She claims, via divorce documents the Daily Mail dug up, that she suffered years of sexual, emotional, and physical abuse at the hands of her then-husband, Kevin Moore. And as proof, she says she has a tape they made of her performing certain unnamed sex acts against her will.
The accusations came up when Dolezal tried to deny Moore access to their son. Moore denied the allegations, but Dolezal's brother Joshua describes being aware of abuse (or at least saw/heard hints of it) in his memoir, Down From the Mountaintop. Then again, Dolezal has since been instrumental in allegations of Joshua sexually abusing their younger sister, so who knows what's going on there.
More from The Stir: Rachel Dolezal Saga Gets Worse With Sexual Abuse Allegations
Since is Rachel Dolezal we're talking about, though, so you know there's more coming. Here's our second bite: Dolezal says there's no biological proof she's her parents' daughter. It's not like they've gotten DNA testing done or anything.
"Up to this point, I know who raised me," Dolezal told Savannah Guthrie. "I haven't had a DNA test. There's been no biological proof that Larry and Ruthanne are my biological parents." She is the walrus, they are the eggmen, goo goo g'joob.
"All I can think to say is WOW," Lawrence Dolezal told the New York Daily News. He then proceeded to call his daughter's bluff, saying he'd see that test and raise her a handful of family members who witnessed her birth -- which was a home birth.
You know, Rachel is going to feel so dumb when she goes through with that DNA test and finds out they're really her biological parents. But then, her next move will probably be trying to prove that Ruthanne and Lawrence are actually black and have been hiding the truth from her all this time.
BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!
On the Today show Dolezal wept as she described how Caitlyn Jenner's Vanity Fair cover resonated with her and also? Dolezal is bisexual. "Just yesterday I finally had a chance to read Caitlyn Jenner's piece in the magazine and I cried," she told Guthrie. "It resonated with some of the themes of isolation, of being misunderstood."
Oh my God, Rachel. Make it stop!
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[/code]How long before that Rachel Dolezal sex tape surfaces -- or do you suspect it doesn't even exist?
Image via NBC News